Saturday, February 16, 2013
The Ocean Won't Listen
No matter how hard you try, when you throw yourself into the sea, your body won't let you drown without something to hold you down. I threw myself into the sea several times, and violently at that. I dug my hands deep into the sand and grabbed at every grain. Under my nails they were grabbing back but there's nothing you can do to fight the current. I was screaming the entire time, one of those screams you let out that scares yourself and it scares everyone around you. But there's never any sound under the water besides a muffled grumbling that surrounds you, and even if there was, the ocean wouldn't listen. I've tried, and several times at that. It was always your name I was screaming but this last time it came out sad and not scary and I'm so sorry about that. But I can't keep jumping into the ocean and playing chicken with the waves and I can't keep holding my breath just to see what happens. You no longer have the strength to keep me under the water and I don't want to drown with you anymore. I want to drown with someone else.
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