The Ocean Won't Listen

No matter how hard you try, when you throw yourself into the sea, your body won't let you drown without something to hold you down. I threw myself into the sea several times, and violently at that. I dug my hands deep into the sand and grabbed at every grain. Under my nails they were grabbing back but there's nothing you can do to fight the current. I was screaming the entire time, one of those screams you let out that scares yourself and it scares everyone around you. But there's never any sound under the water besides a muffled grumbling that surrounds you, and even if there was, the ocean wouldn't listen. I've tried, and several times at that. It was always your name I was screaming but this last time it came out sad and not scary and I'm so sorry about that. But I can't keep jumping into the ocean and playing chicken with the waves and I can't keep holding my breath just to see what happens. You no longer have the strength to keep me under the water and I don't want to drown with you anymore. I want to drown with someone else.