I call it roulette by night,
Let me explain..
Every now and again,
Unknowingly,
You slip into my dreams
You come and go,
just as you please,
And although they are becoming few and far between
I'd appreciate it if you'd leave it to the sheep
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Monday, January 25, 2010
The Boy With A Camera In His Eye
When he looks at her he sees her in at least 3x5, 12 megapixel, perfect lighting
It's not his fault tho
He's just programmed that way
He tries a bit harder, which is obvious, and his intentions are opposite of mine
It's not his fault tho
He's just programmed that way
The boy with a camera in his eye is pointing his shot directly at the apple in mine
Even as neutrals tho, my blood will boil each time I hear a click or see a flash go off
When I look at her I see her as warmth, guiding me, but without artificial light
I do not need a blinding glare to find her in the dark
I use her glow instead
I've faulted and faulted again, which is obvious, but my intentions have remained
It was never about just her or just I
We've just been programmed this way
The boy with a camera in his eye is pointing his shot directly at the apple in mine
Even as neutrals tho, my blood will boil each time I hear a click or see a flash go off
The boy with a camera in his eye is only doing what he loves
However, so am I
It's not his fault tho
He's just programmed that way
He tries a bit harder, which is obvious, and his intentions are opposite of mine
It's not his fault tho
He's just programmed that way
The boy with a camera in his eye is pointing his shot directly at the apple in mine
Even as neutrals tho, my blood will boil each time I hear a click or see a flash go off
When I look at her I see her as warmth, guiding me, but without artificial light
I do not need a blinding glare to find her in the dark
I use her glow instead
I've faulted and faulted again, which is obvious, but my intentions have remained
It was never about just her or just I
We've just been programmed this way
The boy with a camera in his eye is pointing his shot directly at the apple in mine
Even as neutrals tho, my blood will boil each time I hear a click or see a flash go off
The boy with a camera in his eye is only doing what he loves
However, so am I
Monday, January 11, 2010
A Bad Morning
I had a brief conversation with my stomach this morning.
In between the painful grumbles and growls,
it mentioned a few things about changing a few things.
You know, for the better of both of us.
We didn't know it but we had a lot more in common than we had ever realized before.
We both felt empty a good portion of the time,
nausea brought us to our knees,
and neither of us were any good at untying knots or bug catching.
I listened as I laid in bed
and as I tried to understand what it meant,
I got lost in the volume of my own head.
I need to start eating better I guess.
In between the painful grumbles and growls,
it mentioned a few things about changing a few things.
You know, for the better of both of us.
We didn't know it but we had a lot more in common than we had ever realized before.
We both felt empty a good portion of the time,
nausea brought us to our knees,
and neither of us were any good at untying knots or bug catching.
I listened as I laid in bed
and as I tried to understand what it meant,
I got lost in the volume of my own head.
I need to start eating better I guess.
Monday, January 4, 2010
Tearing Up
I had this dream where you and I tore each other apart
I had found a loose thread hanging from your seams, and persisted to fuss with it until you came all undone
I was gentle but did not understand what I was doing and I became tangled in each strand that fell
You searched for a way to start a small rip somewhere, along my torso maybe
I saw you ask yourself where the best place to start would be
We took turns clawing at each other, picking at pieces we thought would sting most
We made sure our eyes were the last to go, so we could watch each other work
When we were almost down to nothing, I looked at you and tried to spell out "I'm sorry" with blinks and winks
You began to tear up, and your eyes looked angry but so sad
I'm sure things could have been different
I remember that we couldn't finish what we intended to do
I remember that we couldn't leave ourselves in a pile next to each other
I remember trying to patch myself back together
I'm sure I was missing pieces, but as long as I could gather you up and mend you together, I knew that you could fill the pieces I was missing
The next night I had another dream, where you and I told each other everything
We stayed up all night talking about your favorite color and my favorite band,
how you wanted to change the country and about things that I can't stand
I remember laying on my bed with your legs around my waist
I remember pretending I was dead so you would have to hold my weight
I remember your hands on my torso and the look that was on your face
I had found a loose thread hanging from your seams, and persisted to fuss with it until you came all undone
I was gentle but did not understand what I was doing and I became tangled in each strand that fell
You searched for a way to start a small rip somewhere, along my torso maybe
I saw you ask yourself where the best place to start would be
We took turns clawing at each other, picking at pieces we thought would sting most
We made sure our eyes were the last to go, so we could watch each other work
When we were almost down to nothing, I looked at you and tried to spell out "I'm sorry" with blinks and winks
You began to tear up, and your eyes looked angry but so sad
I'm sure things could have been different
I remember that we couldn't finish what we intended to do
I remember that we couldn't leave ourselves in a pile next to each other
I remember trying to patch myself back together
I'm sure I was missing pieces, but as long as I could gather you up and mend you together, I knew that you could fill the pieces I was missing
The next night I had another dream, where you and I told each other everything
We stayed up all night talking about your favorite color and my favorite band,
how you wanted to change the country and about things that I can't stand
I remember laying on my bed with your legs around my waist
I remember pretending I was dead so you would have to hold my weight
I remember your hands on my torso and the look that was on your face
Saturday, January 2, 2010
Butterfly Belly
I stuck a net down my throat to catch all the butterflies
bouncing off the walls of my stomach
I put them in a jar and wrote your name on it
The jar sits on my top shelf for everyone to see
Sometimes a few escape and quickly make their way down my windpipe, back into my belly
They multiply once they're inside and I go get my net again
The jar is getting crowded recently but I don't think they mind
I heard butterflies like staying together anyway
If I were one I would fly next to you and try to keep up
and I would hope that the butterfly version of you would stop her wings
just so we can fly in sync
There's now a second jar that sits on my top shelf
This one is smaller but it fits two comfortably
I took a permanent marker and wrote our names on it
One right next to the other
bouncing off the walls of my stomach
I put them in a jar and wrote your name on it
The jar sits on my top shelf for everyone to see
Sometimes a few escape and quickly make their way down my windpipe, back into my belly
They multiply once they're inside and I go get my net again
The jar is getting crowded recently but I don't think they mind
I heard butterflies like staying together anyway
If I were one I would fly next to you and try to keep up
and I would hope that the butterfly version of you would stop her wings
just so we can fly in sync
There's now a second jar that sits on my top shelf
This one is smaller but it fits two comfortably
I took a permanent marker and wrote our names on it
One right next to the other
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